Lifestyle Changes
by ohsohargitay
Summary: Basically, I've completely missed out the whole season finale and pretended it didn't happen.. oops! ;) Olivia will be making major lifestyle changes but the journey there won't be easy. I suck at writing summaries so I do apologise!
1. Chapter 1: Feelings

Olivia awoke in her bed due to the sound of her blaring alarm, 06:00 it read as she rolled over she noticed Brain was still sound asleep next to her. That was something she still wasn't used to, waking up next to him near enough every morning, it was strange, yet nice. It was just like Brian had moved in, it just wasn't properly official. She started to shake him awake but he just moaned and continued to sleep. "Brian, get up I have to go to work!" Olivia said, sternly. He just groaned. She realised she was fighting a loosing battle. She gave up trying to wake him, she got out of bed and left him sleeping. Brian and Olivia had been going out for nearly a year now, it was getting quite serious. The longest relationship Olivia had ever had. They just clicked.

She started getting ready as he woke up, he only woke up because of the sound of her hair dryer, as she began to dry her long-ish brunette hair, he just watched her. She switched the hair dryer off and put it on the ground, as she stood up, she noticed he was awake. "Good morning, beautiful" he said as he watched her pottering about, getting ready. He always managed to put a smile on Olivia's face in the morning, one of the few things that did.

They had a coffee together, talking about absolute rubbish, as usual. That's one of the main reason's she liked him. They could talk about anything. She felt at ease around him. Olivia had to be in by 7:30, bit later than usual so she wasn't complaining. Just as she was leaving Brian gave her a cuddle and kissed her forehead. She really loved this side of him, always put her in a good mood before the day started.

* * *

As Olivia reached the precinct she sighed, "_Another day busting perps_" whilst taking a sip of her coffee trying to properly wake herself up. Little did Olivia know that the day that lay ahead was about to change her life.

Amanda appeared from out of no where behind Olivia, causing her to jump a little. "What's up? You seem miles away?" Amanda laughed.

"Nothing, I'm absolutely fine," Olivia said a bit more happy and smiley than usual, "You alright?"

"Something- or someone more like- has put you in a good mood this morning eh? and I'm alright, let's go before we're late!" Amanda said, pushing Olivia forward, the two women just laughed.

* * *

Olivia was sitting at her desk, having a conversation with Nick, Amanda and Fin about nothing in particular. They weren't working on any cases so far today, just trying to get through a mountain of paper-work they had been putting off for day's now - which didn't seem to be happening anytime soon.

"Olivia, Nick, get yourselves down to the hospital, a 17-year-old girl has been brought in badly beaten and raped but shes also just given birth, it's not looking too good. So hurry!" Captain Cragen said, over the office. Olivia grabbed her keys, Nick followed grabbing his badge.

On the way there, Nick noticed how happy Olivia had been lately. "What's made you so happy this morning?" He noticed she had been particularly happy this morning.

"Not much, just in a good mood I guess," Olivia said laughing. Nick knew it was Brian that made her happy, he couldn't stand the man. Although he did tolerate him just for the simple reason he made Liv happy.

As they approached the teenagers room in the hospital, the duo noticed she was wired up to many machines to help her breathe as she lay there - lifeless. The doctor approached the detectives as they stood outside the door speculating. "Can I help you?" The doctor asked politely, unsure of who they were.

"Detective Amaro, this is Detective Benson," Nick said, flashing his badge, "She doesn't look too good, does she?" Nick questioned, hinting for more information.

"No, I personally don't think she's going to make it, if I'm completely honest, she lost quite a lot of blood.." The doctor replied. Olivia still watching the girl, shaking her head and biting her lip, she still hated this part of the job, no matter how many times she witnesses someone so critically ill, it still effects her. "She also had a very high level of alcohol in her blood stream." The doctor continued.

"DRUNK?!" Olivia said, almost shouting, furiously. "She was almost about to give birth and she was DRUNK?!" Olivia said, emphasising the word 'drunk' to confirm she heard the doctor properly. Nick could see the anger building on Liv's face. He didn't say nothing. He just took a step back.

"Liv, calm down." Nick said, quitely. Angering Olivia a little bit more but she refused to let it show. "Have you contacted the family?" Nick asked, Olivia completely ignoring him and jumping in.

"I'm fine. I'm fine. Where's the baby? How is he?" Olivia asked, assuming the baby was a boy. She looked to the doctor, looked to Nick, then continued to watch the teenager.

"She doesn't have any family according to the records and SHE is through here, one of our nurses are looking after her." The doctor replied, indicating Olivia to follow where her arm was pointing. Olivia turned around to face the doctor, she began to walk in the direction the doctor was pointing.

"Oh, a little girl? Does she have a name?" Olivia asked, smiling, looking at the doctor.

"Nope, not yet. You can hold her if you like?" The doctor said, smiling at Olivia, she could secretly tell Olivia just wanted to give the newborn a cuddle just by looking at the smile on her face.

"Really? You don't mind?" Olivia said, surprised. Nick just stood back, watching, he didn't know if this was a good idea or not, but he didn't say a word. The doctor shook her head and gently passed the baby to Liv, Nick noticed the instant love in Olivia's eye's as she held the newborn, he had never witnessed this side of Olivia before. No one had ever seen this side of her before - except Brian. "Aren't you beautiful?" Olivia said, softly to the baby as she rocked her back and forth. Olivia couldn't stop smiling as the baby drifted off to sleep in her arm's, Olivia continued to rock her.

"Suits ya!" Nick said, teasingly. Olivia laughed and smiled.

"You've got the golden touch!" The doctor joined in with Nick, teasing Olivia.

"ha ha, hilarious you two!" Olivia shot back, quietly laughing, trying not to wake the baby up.

"Liv, we've got to get back to the station, that was Fin saying someone want's to talk to us." Nick noticed the disappointment in Olivia's eyes as she realised she had to hand the baby back. "We'll come back later" Nick added. Olivia just wanted to take the baby home and look after her.

As they headed back to the precinct, Nick noticed how quiet Olivia was compared to on the way there, her mood had deteriorated completely. He knew it was the baby that was lying all by itself, that was getting to her. Nick started to question Olivia, he treaded carefully to start with. "Did you not want kids?" he said, concentrating on the road, trying not to make eye contact with Olivia, he didn't know how she was going to take to his line of questioning.

"I always have wanted kids, I just never found the right person, I never really made the effort. I tried to adopt years ago but got turned down," Olivia replied, Nick could hear the disappointment in Olivia's voice as she spoke, he was also shocked at how much she was beginning to open up to him.

"Why?" Nick asked sympathetically.

"Because I was single, I work basically 24/7, they didn't think I was good enough to be a mother basically" Olivia said, her voice starting to break, Nick had never seen this kind of emotion from Olivia before. She was getting far too emotionally attached to this case, Nick wouldn't tell because of how disappointed Olivia would be if she never got to see that kid again.

"You'd be a great mom, Liv" Nick said, smootly causing Olivia to smile. "Does Brian want kids?" Nick asked. Olivia smiled.

"I don't really know, we've never spoken about it before." Olivia replied, starting to get a bit edgy with all the questions Nick was asking. She started fiddling about with a bit of paper. "How's Zara?" Olivia asked, trying to change the spotlight of her.

"Yeah, she's good. I really miss her though" Nick replied.

"Bet you do" Olivia said, simply.

* * *

After talking to the woman who they needed to speak to which turned out to be useless, they all headed down to the pub where the went most lunch-times they could get away. Amanda got the round of juice in, Olivia wanted something stronger but she knew she still had near enough a full day's work to complete. They all noticed how sad Olivia looked, Fin and Amanda looked at Nick who just shook his head, as to say 'don't ask'. They attempted to talk about anything that wasn't related to the case. Olivia was in a world of her own, she was lost in her thoughts, staring at her glass yet not looking at it, no one knew what she was thinking.

Nick recieved a text message from the hospital. "Liv, the girl died, 10 minutes ago." Nick whispered to Olivia who was sitting next to him, drinking her lemonade.

"What's going to happen to the baby?" Olivia asked, quickly jumping up.


	2. Chapter 2: Realisation

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews regarding the last chapter, I hope you like where this is going. I like reviews, so thanks ;)**

* * *

Olivia ran out towars the door. Everyone just looked at each other, they were all oblivious as to what was going on with Liv - apart from Nick who followed Olivia closely, not letting her out of his sight. She headed straight for the car they arrived in by then she realised she didn't have any keys as it was Nick's car. Olivia soon noticed Nick was right behind her and sighed. She knew she was about to recieve twenty questions.

"Liv, where are you going?" Nick asked, worryingly, confued, yet, already knowing the answer to question but acting as if he didn't.

"You know exactly where I'm going," She could see right through him. "Well, you need to take me or give me the keys!" Olivia demanded, pulling on the driver's seat door handle, forcefully, impatiently.

"And what are you going to do? Walk in and just take the baby?" Nick asked, trying to figure out Olivia's next move.

"No, you know I know I can't do that. What do you think I am?!" Olivia snapped, "look I'm sorry, I just want to make sure the baby is okay." Olivia said lying through her teeth, not completely lying though because she did care for the baby's welfare, just a bit too much. She didn't know what she wanted, she just thought about that helpless baby who now had no one.

"You know she'll be fine. The doctors will look after her until she is ready to go to foster parents until they find her a permanent home for her, why are you so worried?" Nick asked, still confused, he didn't have a clue as to what was going through her head at this moment.

"You don't understand. She needs a home, I can give her a home" Nick couldn't believe what he was hearing. Where was this all suddenly coming from?

"Wait a minute. You want to adopt this kid?" Nick asked. "And what would Brian say about this? Olivia you're not thinking this through properly, come back inside and we'll all talk!" Nick continued trying to talk her into forgetting about this.

"I am thinking this through, I'm going now. Wether you're taking me or I'm calling a cab, you choose, _PARTNER_" Olivia said, emphasising the work 'partner'. Olivia was getting very inpatient, Nick could see it in her face. She didn't have a clue what she was going to do next but she desperately wanted to adopt the kid.

Nick sighed, finally opening the car. "I'm only taking you if I can drive, so swap!" Nick demanded, Olivia sighed heavly and moved. Olivia knew she had to speak this through with Brian first but she just wanted to see what was happening with the baby before she decided anything, or before she made any rash decisions. She knew she couldn't make any quick decision's because of all the hoops she would have to jump through, all the sacrifices she man have to make but this was what she wanted. She wanted this with Brian though, not alone.

The whole car journey there Nick continued to grill Liv about her next move. She felt like a criminal under Nick's interrogation. She was ignoring him, letting him ramble on until she couldn't take anymore.

"Will you just shut up? I'm trying to think!" Olivia snapped, taking Nick by surprise. He didn't say another word the whole way there until he pulled up at the hospital.

"I hope you know what you're doing!" Nick said, "and, oh, I'm coming with you." He added, not giving Olivia a choice.

"I don't need someone to hold my hand" Olivia stated, her voice was shaking and breaking. She was struggiling to hold it together. She had no idea what was coming over her. Why was she acting like this? Why did she want to adopt this child so bad? Even she didn't know the answers.

She ran to the ward to see the baby, abusing her authority. Nick didn't say anything, he just followed her as she flashed her badge and shouted "Detective Benson," at the poor recpetion lady who didn't even have time to blink before Olivia was already in the ward. She continued to walk until she reached the little girls room. As she strolled in she spotted the nurse she had already previously spoken with that morning. "How is she?" Olivia asked, looking lovingly at the baby that lay beneathe her.

"She's a little fighter," the nurse smiled. "You can hold her again, if you like I think she likes you!" The nurse laughed, Nick just stood back in the corner of the room. Saying nothing. Olivia was shaking and she didn't know why. "Detective Benson, are you okay?" The nurse asked, slightly concerned.

"Yeah, Yeah, I'm fine." Olivia replied, taking a deep breath. As she looked down at the little girl looking back at her with big brown eye's and chestnut hair, just like Olivia had, she realised how much she wanted to look after the innocent baby. "I need to make a phone-call, i'll be back in a second" Olivia said, walking outside, looking at Nick.

Olivia rang Casey, she hadn't spoken to her in about a year but she was the first person she thought to phone. She had no idea why she picked Casey, she could have picked Cabot or Barba but instead she picked Novak. Every ringing sound Olivia heard, felt like a life-time to her. Finally Casey answered, a bit confused. "Casey, it's Benson!" Olibia said, business-like.

"Yeah, what's up? You alright?" Casey knew something had to be wrong for Olivia to be phoning her out of the blue.

"I need a favour.." Olivia said, unsure of how Casey would react when she told her what the favour actually was.

"What's up, Liv?" Casey asked, Casey had done many a favour for Olivia, like Olivia had done for Casey, they had never always seen eye-to-eye but they knew they'd be there for each-other when they needed help, no matter what it was.

"Um, Er.." Olivia stuttered.

"Spit it out, Liv, or I can't help you!" Casey said, getting worried.

"I want to adopt a victim's baby!" Olivia spat out, realising how wrong it sounded when she actually said it out loud.

"Olivia," Casey said, quietly, "That will not be a walk in the park, the amount of hoops you will need to jump through." Casey replied, straight to the point, not sugar-coating anything. She was shocked at what she was hearing. Olivia had dealt with many baby cases but never wanted to adopt any of the children.

"I know that's why I need your help!" Olivia said.


End file.
